Tonight, Erin and I went to Chuy’s to hear the Elvis impersonator and to try the Elvis menu.  I wore the Elvis sunglasses with chops attached that are my normal sunglasses.  I’ve had and lost many a pair, so the last time my mom was in the Vegas airport she picked me up a few pair, one of which I loaned to Erin for the evening.  Well it turns out that people dressed as Elvis eat free on His birthday and our glasses get-up counted, so we got free queso, enchiladas and tres leches cake.  Sometimes even when I don’t go to Homeslice I end up with free food.  That’s what The King’s love can do for you.  Happy Birthday Elvis!

PS – If you ever want to go to the best place on Earth, I mean it, go to Graceland Too.  Don’t just follow the link.  Google it.  Better yet, don’t.  Just go.  It’s in Holly Springs, Mississippi, about 45 minutes south of Memphis.  It’s best if you just go and experience it without knowing too much.  Greatest place in the history of the world.

1. Urban Farm Bicycle Tour – I did this last year and really liked it.  Get some exercise, pet some goats, support local food/tea and meet some new friends.  There’s lots of starting points, and stops at Boggy Creek Farm, Zhi Tea, Rain Lily Farm, Hands of the Earth Farm (where Urban Roots rocks it) and more.
2. Edible Austin Tea Festival – Drink delicate teas, sample tea-paired foods, learn about tea, tea tea tea!
3. Fresh! screening – Ok, so you’ve drank from the Pollan/Kingsolver fount, what are the alternatives to industrial agriculture?  How can we build a sustainable food supply system that is fair to workers, consumers and the planet?  Find out at this screening I wish I could attend.  Joel Salatin, the Polyface Farms guy that Michal Pollan always talks about, will be there to answer questions. Proceeds benefit Urban Roots.
4. Free and semi-secret Peanut Butter Wolf show, sponsored by some non-Tito’s vodka company – You know how every party is cooler if it’s exclusive and secret? Smirnoff does and so they’re bringing Peanut Butter Wolf, an amazing DJ whom my dancey-dance friends rave about.
5. Manfest – Am I not Mantastic enough for you?  See barbarians fight, gnaw at turkey legs and get drunk.
6. Holiday By The Tracks: Elgin, TX – Wanna get your picture taking with Santa, see a Christmas lights parade or otherwise not be in Austin to compete against me?  Visit historic downtown Elgin!
7. Holiday Pet Photos with your pit bull.  Not even kidding.

With all these cool events, there’s no reason to come to Homeslice to compete against me in the HOES competition.  Seriously.

Thanks to Slice for the link and the troops and vets for sacrificing on our behalf.  I wish our elected leaders could show their appreciation by not entangling them in no-win quagmires.

Panther Pizza

A few weeks ago I was an extra for the TV show “Friday Night Lights”.  It’s a drama about high school football in small town Texas.

They said not to bring any clothes with logos, but I figured I’d try to plug Homeslice anyway by wearing my hat.  When I was sent to wardrobe they made me take it off, and didn’t like most of the rest of my clothes either, so they gave me some “Dillon High” stuff.  I did see Homeslice stickers and stuff on camera gear, so maybe the crew has some good taste.

When Erin and I lived in India, we were extras in the Bollywood flick “Charas”.  I ran across a bridge screaming “Mother Help Me” in Hindi and eventually got shot by the Taliban, who were invading the hippie drug commune where I resided.  I think.  Anyway, they cut me but left Erin in, maybe because she looked a lot better dead splayed on a rock with her chest arching skyward than I did flinging myself into the river.  Not that I’m bitter.

So I was no stranger to being an extra.  Lots of hanging out, little acting.  I brought books, and unlike many of the actors, had no illusions about this being my jumpstart to fame.  But whatever, I got paid to read books and do nothing, two of my strong suits.

My last scene was a pool party.  I joined 60 other 20-somethings at some random house in a residential neighborhood to hang out and act like a hip, partying high-schooler.  It was a weird experience, everyone at this party seemed a lot hotter and less interesting than the folks I remember from high school parties.   Like at many high school parties I attended, I found myself hanging out by the food in a futile effort to ward off awkwardness.

They had lots of pizza boxes chaotically spread across the table, from “Panther Pizza”.  The mascot for Dillon High, the fictional high school where the show takes place, is the panthers.  Hence “Panther Pizza”.  It tasted like chain pizza that was sure as hell not from Homeslice, but it was free.  Actually, I got paid to eat it.  By the time the pool party rolled around, I was getting paid time and a half for overtime.  Top that, Homeslice!

Free Pizza For Camaro Owners

I love it.  The founder of Papa John’s Pizza sold his Camaro when he was younger to keep Papa John’s afloat.  Now that he’s been successful, he wanted his muscle car back.  He offered $250,000 to find it, blogged about his search, and finally succeeded.  So today, Camaro owners get a one-topping pizza for free from Papa John’s.  Good on him for helping the rest of the country celebrate his find.  It’s safe to say that readers of this blog appreciate free pizza and the establishments that generously offer it as prizes.

Chris Floyd, Dominator

Just a couple of Homeslice-related news items:

• This is somewhat belated, but 3-peat Homeslice pizza-eating contest defending champ Chris Floyd won the cupcake eating contest at the Cupcake Smackdown 1.0 just before I left for Pecos.  Sometimes our paths enjoyably cross at Homeslice, but I hope to never face him in a competition.  His easygoing demeanor hides the intensity of a champion.  Congrats, Chris.  Keep on rocking in the free world.
• Homeslice manager Nano Whitman is playing a gig with Kat Edmondson at Lambert’s tonight and at the Tiniest Bar in Texas tomorrow night.  Cover is $5 tomorrow, not sure about TBiT.  Mike D is coming in town in the afternoon, we might go to tomorrow’s show if he’s feeling up to it after the drive.  I hope he is, Nano’s great, check out “Break It On Your Own Time” on Nano’s site or Myspace.

BTW, in black and white, Chris looks like Nano, except with more food in his mouth.

David Sedaris delivers a pizza (from Boing Boing).  Love it!

No boogers in these reigional pizzas! We hope.

If you go to Yahoo! today, July 11, you’ll be bombarded with ads for Domino’s Pizza’s “What’s America’s Favorite Pizza” contest.  Vote, and you’re can enter a contest where one winner drawn from the pool of applicants wins a free year of pizza.  Sound familiar?

When you click the ad, it takes over the whole page, and you get to watch a video where actors trying to represent various regions around the country defend “their” pizza and trash smack about the others.  How delightfully parochial and rivalry-inducing!

It’s painfully obvious that none of the actors actually come from their regions. Enter copious amounts of stereotyping.

The Pacific Veggie Pizza (not to be confused with the “urban” Cali Chicken Bacon Ranch Pizza) actors are surfer types who say “dude” a lot, the Philly ones say “Yo” and have hoop earrings, etc.  Oddly, there’s no typecasts actors for the Buffalo Chicken or the Honolulu Hawaiian.  Looks like they couldn’t think up anything that would stereotype Buffalo, NY and/or didn’t want to insult Hawaiians.

UPDATE: See helpful comment from Jon.  It turns out that the four guys are actually franchise owners from those regions.  Wow, never woulda thought.

The whole thing is ridiculous.  The Memphis offering is the Memphis BBQ Chicken.  Had anyone in Domino’s marketing department ever traveled to Memphis, they would have realized that “BBQ” and “Chicken” do not go in the same sentence together in Memphis.  It’s a pork ribs, no sauce kinda place.  As a non-pork eating Jew who visited Memphis looking for some BBQ, I know.

When I read the extensive terms and conditions, I came across Domino’s(’s?) definition of a free year’s worth of pizza:

Free Domino’s Pizza for a Year awarded in the form of fifty-two (52) $20 Domino’s gift cards; terms and conditions of gift cards apply. Approximate Retail Value: $1,040.

So basically, it’s one or two pizzas per week.  That’s certainly nice (where are you Pizza Hut, The Hut, The Zone whatever you call yourselves these days?), but it’s no Homeslice, whose definition is merely “one large dine-in pizza with unlimited standard or premium toppings, every time you walk in the door for a year.  Slices too”.

It’s too bad I couldn’t vote for the infamous booger pizza from Domino’s, that’s my favorite.

Anthony Mangieri of Una Pizza Napoletana, photo by Evan Sung for NYT

The NY Times had a big piece yesterday on the next generation of best pizza places in NYC.  The article is thorough but pretentious.  It did make me want to go to NYC to try some of their pizza, I’ve only tried Grimaldi’s and it was badass.   True pizza aficionados will appreciate the interactive feature with food porn images of the various pizzas.  Don’t read the story hungry!

• Crazy Japanese Pizza Commercial

I love the toppings’ choreographed dance, and their awkward, embarrassed pause halfway after the pizza slice tearfully thanks them.  Only in Japan.

• Pizza Vending Machine

I’m amazed at how much technology went into this ridiculous abomination.  Look at the tomato sauce dispenser.  Couldn’t those engineers find anything more useful to do with their skills?  The developer, Claudio Torghele, is Italian.  Do they not have pizza-by-the-slice places in Italy?  The NY Times says the vending machines cost $32,000, and serve $4.50 pizzas.  That’s a lot of money to recoup (not to mention electricity charges) for a vendor-owner.  As sacrilegious as this monstrosity is, I’d probably try a pizza from a pizza vending machine once.

• Pizza delivery guy drops pizza on ground, still delivers it:

Damn those pesky cameras!  Luckily for the pizza delivery guy, he got his tip before the footage was seen by the customer.

• Green box, an environmentally friendly pizza box.

When I first saw this video, I just thought it was a joke.  I thought they were mocking the VC crowd with a clever pitch of a normal pizza box.  But when I watched it again and read the little info box on the side of the Youtube page, I realized that it’s an actual company called e.c.o.incorporated that has an actual product.  Their “Green Box” has perforations to make the demonstrated folds and tears easier.  It seems like a great idea, I hope it takes off.  Erin and I have been unintentionally amassing pizza boxes in our kitchen, and this would help us ease the storage burden.